To "Mr." Household

Working outside the home is still often seen as the responsibility of the husband only. If the case because the husband would "choose" to work at home, it needed "courage" in this pair to switch roles.

The division of work without seeing him as a husband or wife, and if not managed properly, can trigger prolonged conflict in the household. Feelings of guilt, low self, or vice versa can easily create one of the shoulder.

Hartono (39) who lived in the area Cibubur, East Jakarta, and even up to almost divorced after many failed. Father of two children worked at the company's advertising, but he chose early retirement. Next five years he tried to have its own, but failed.
"Maybe I do not have many talents," said Hartono.
Miyarti (40), Hartono wife, her husband initially did not object to early retirement. However, after her husband is too old unemployed, Miyarti feel "sick" as well. According Miyarti, he was disappointed because Hartono deems less diligent attempt.
"He frequently changed direction, when the new business dijalaninya has not been established," said Miyarti.

As a husband, Hartono also often experience inner conflict. Moreover, when the children need money for school.
"I only just because it still can not give money for the children. There is also a pain in my heart," Hartono said while pointing chest.
It felt the same Rubiyanto (34), which is familiar disapa Anto. He never stopped for eight hours work. After his wife's first child's birth, decided Anto work release, to accompany his wife cared for their first child. Decision was taken after he discussed with his wife.
Although a decision together, Anto living Ciledug, Tangerang, this remains only "shock" the rhythm changes in day-to-day. At the time that he felt that the work not only as a "tool" to get revenue.

For Anto, the work also means self. Once the loss of employment, she was involved disgrace. Although the household chores actually sequester enough time.
"But, still only enggak nice to see it when his wife went home and workplace. Meanwhile, I seem I relax at home," said Anto, who then decided to work again outside the home.

Homekeeping
As if life depends on the earnings of the husband and wife make a "know themselves" to share duties at home. Hartono when the work is still rare to work at home and his wife participated in the completion of all work pretty households. Every morning Hartono wash clothes and bathe their children, before mengantarkannya to school.
The process changes the rhythm of work outside the home to be in the house is not easily passed Hartono. Initially, because no longer work outside the home, Hartono often sleep late at night and wake up the day. Meanwhile, his wife should wake up early in the morning, clean the house, and the child before leaving for work.
"Old-old wife how I feel I just relax at home," said Hartono. Squabbling between the mouth is not terelakkan.
Hartono now be able to adjust to the work at home. He replaces the task to his wife and children bathe mengantarkannya to school. In the afternoon Hartono sometimes also cook.
Meanwhile, for Tarta (32), work at home do not help his wife, but can also kill saturation. Tarta once during a year does not work outside the home. In addition to completing household chores, she also has a routine escort duties and to meet his wife to work.
Tarta also do not object to bathe, play, and put his son.
"If the wife returned with a working face is very tired, I usually accompany the child to sleep," said Tarta living in Makassar and is now working outside the home as a supplier of goods.

While unemployed, Anto also learn to manage a variety of children's literature. Almost all work is done Anto also home, from washing dishes and clothes, clothes menyetrika, swab floors, cleaning bathrooms and bedrooms, to cook. Anto the house even though his wife never ask him to do all the household affairs.
Later, Anto feel it can benefit many children in the home. He can observe the development of each child. Relationship with the children also become closer. What is also clear that the burden lightened wife.

Although more work is now outside the home, Anto still took the children and do household chores. Despite it only made on holidays. He can enjoy them, and do not feel it as physical and psychological burden.

Cock bustup
Although the role of "father" of households conducted with full awareness, but there was still feeling guilty, does not believe in themselves, and low self-perceived their husbands. From the wife, often without conscious do-or say the words sting spouses. These factors often trigger a husband-wife squabble.
As experienced by Hartono and his wife, Miyarti. Hartono often involved in cold war with his wife. For example, the only trouble turning off the stove and forget to make a cooking utensil used up, Hartono not talk for days by the wife.

Meanwhile, Erlita (36), Anto wife, never be angry just because her husband forgot to drink water so white bed awake. Anto-uringan can uring prolonged only because the wife forget. Instead, Erlita rebuke her husband also have been a careless discard cigarette ashes.
Each time a quarrel, Anto prize often bob up and down that only men who do not have unemployment wages.
"If it is so, I still choose it," said Ita, Erlita nickname.
Situation when the "heat", even Miyarti to ask several times menceraikannya Hartono only. He also had Hartono as the man who is not responsible as head of the household.
During the household chores, and both Anto Tarta, picking lesson confess.
"I learned how I became a mother, worker, and his wife. For me, she also ditantang for more patience, emotional hold, and discredit," said Anto.
However, the viability of families of materials are more dependent on the wife. For household needs, Ita every day to provide spending money of Rp 30,000-Rp 50,000 to Anto.
According Miyarti, other than for the side dish-pauk, spending money day-to-day family must also be counted with the purpose of buying cigarettes and snack for my husband.
When children are large, and demand fulfillment of the higher needs of the family, the husband was returning to work outside the home. This time they better understand the grief like household tasks.